Damned If You Do and Damned If You Don’t!


Caution: serve at temperatures less than 149F (65C).

Don’t let anyone fool you or say otherwise. Growing old sucks.

Every time older folks turn around, something else pops up to proclaim they’re not spring chickens anymore.

That annoying crick in the neck, pulled-out back on occasion, Arthur Rightis, whomever he is; increasingly less tolerance for nonsense and beginning to not sive a ghit, to put it nicely, are constant reminders of my fading mortality.

On top of that and every new, daily abnormality that joins the cacophony of other aging complaints, something else is discovered ultimately by recent studies that say what was once good for us is now bad, and vise versa.

The AARP circulars and monthly magazine are the worst for breeding paranoia, like presenting research about how omega-3 oil, which was considered to be great in lowering cholesterol and good for the heart muscle, now may lead to prostate cancer in men.

My doctor had suggested I take fish-oil globules after each meal over a decade ago. Stopped taking them right away after reading the aforementioned article, although I still eat fish rich in the compound.

How about that wonderful, hot cup of coffee in the morning, at dinner or in the evening? Don’t know what I’d do without it.

Current findings from the World Health Organization indicate that drinking very hot beverages,  149F (65C)—cooler than a cup of coffee from most take-out joints—can lead to cancer of the esophagus.

Other studies have found regular coffee drinkers, those who have five or less cups in a day, tend to live longer by having a lower risk of dying from problems such as heart diseases, diabetes, brain conditions and suicide.

The old cliché, “damned if you do and damned if you don’t,” holds true in this instance. Now I stick an ice cube in my java to cool it down before drinking.

The medical field years ago had warned against regular consumption of eggs, and to eat them sparingly to avoid heart troubles. Now, according to the latest research, they are all right to eat anytime for their good cholesterol.

Four strips of bacon with a couple of eggs over easy are what I consider to be a hearty breakfast, but now they’re saying bacon can lead to cancer, like charbroiling a good steak is a no-no anymore.

Meat when sizzled releases carcinogens that destroy the body. I eat my beloved bacon only once a week now on Sunday mornings, maybe twice a week.

Studies have suggested drinking alcohol in excess leads to cancer. That’s not a surprise to me, considering what it does to one’s liver. Fortunately, I drink it rarely anymore.

Meanwhile, a glass of red wine daily is recommended for lower incidences of cardiovascular disease, mortality rates and type-2 diabetes.

Moderation is the key in life. Dark chocolate is now another good thing to eat for a healthy heart when taken with restraint for gluttony. My dentist might disagree with its inherent benefits however.

I’m a firm believer in antioxidants, like what is found in red wine and dark chocolates. Green tea is another drink high in free-radical busters,  breaking up those nasty elements which tear away at the very fiber of cells, turning the latter into carcinogenic entities.

I make it a point to drink at least twenty ounces of green tea daily, but at temperatures less than 149F (65C).

My father used to speak of dying often when I’d visit him in his later years. It used to annoy me to hear him talk that way. I’d tell him to stop, for he had many years left; and he did.

Now I’m at that age as he was then and find myself thinking a lot about my inevitable demise. That’s why it’s important to get as much out of whatever time is left. Carpe diem, or seize the moment is my motto.

All of this will probably change when the next, latest research comes out, telling us it’s OK to take fish-oil globules again, for it actually reduces the chances for prostate cancer in men and heart disease for everyone.

Then it will be fine to get drunk often, as it’s good for the blood flow in the brain. Boiling hot coffee and tea will actually be a medical remedy for a good hangover; and we’ll be able to eat as much bacon and charbroiled steak as desired.

Thanks, for stopping by and allowing me to ramble on, and for your continued support.

Hope you are maintaining  health and sanity during this blistering heat wave that’s engulfed the entire US.

For those elsewhere in the world, I hope Mother Nature is treating you well.







About Mike Slickster

As an early retiree with an honorary doctorate degree from the proverbial "School of Hard Knocks," this upcoming author with a lot of free time on his hands utilizes his expansive repertoire for humorous yet tragic, wildly creative writing that contains years of imaginative fantasy, pure nonsense, classic slapstick, extreme happiness and searing heartbreak; gathered by a wealth of personal experiences throughout his thrilling—sometimes mundane or unusually horrid—free-spirited, rock-'n'-roller-coaster ride around our beloved Planet Earth. Mike Slickster's illustrious quest continues, living now in Act Three of his present incarnation, quite a bit on the cutting edge of profundity and philosophical merriment as seen through his colorful characters, most notably evident in the amusing Thirty Days Across the Big Pond series, all of which can be found at Lulu.com.
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2 Responses to Damned If You Do and Damned If You Don’t!

  1. shirleyann21 says:

    And of course the other thing worse than growing old is not growing old so it’s a win win 😉

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