Making America Great!

If it was up to Ben Franklin, the turkey would be our national bird.

Let’s jump right into the craziness that’s found around the U.S.A. lately, shall we?

A Cleveland, Ohio, man had ordered one cup of coffee at a McDonald’s drive-thru. When picking up his order at the window, the fast-food restaurant’s employee accidentally handed him two cups of coffee instead.

The clerk had re-checked the customer’s order in the meantime and asked to see his receipt, upon which time the man laughed allegedly and told her he had ordered both cups. When the woman requested to see his receipt a second time, the perpetrator whipped the tray of hot coffee back inside the drive-thru’s window before taking off, injuring the server who was hospitalized for injuries sustained as a result.

The incident was recorded by the store’s security cameras both in and outside the restaurant, showing the act of violent behavior on the customer’s part, resulting in first-degree burns to the victim’s neck and shoulder. The police were called and the man was arrested shortly thereafter not far down the road from the McDonalds.

He was indicted on two counts of second-degree felonious assault, each of which carries a maximum sentence of eight years in prison.

Elsewhere in the nation, a New Port Richey, Florida, woman was arrested for tossing pizza at the owner of a pizzeria for not being satisfied with the service, claiming the cheese on the pie was rotten, causing her son to vomit. She demanded a refund.

The owner claimed he would not refund the order but was going to make her another pie when the customer went bonkers. After the multiple slice-throwing melee occurred, the crazed lady left the premises and returned to her car, when the owner wrote down her tag number and called the cops.

Upon their arrival to the restaurant, the police reported that they found the proprietor’s head and chest covered in tomato sauce. Tracing the license plate, the authorities arrested the woman at her home. She was charged with one count of pizza battery.

Why do I keep thinking of the movie, Animal House, and the scene, “Food Fight”?

Not for the faint of heart.

In other insanity, a high-school junior from the Sweetwater Union School District in California jumped into a shark tank at the Living Coast Discovery Center in Chula Vista.

Claiming he did it for a bet in exchange for cash and a designer belt, the courageous Generation Z’er after the fact was reported as saying he regretted it, adding, “I didn’t think of the consequences that were going to happen, and I realize it was very dangerous now that I did it.”

Of course, someone video-captured the event with their smartphone.

The youngster, who got into all kinds of trouble, is required to do thirty hours of community service at the center. He was quoted by news outlets as saying, “I’m looking forward to helping them out after what I did. I want to apologize to all the chaperones there and all the teachers that were there, making them look bad. I regret it.”

It’s quite reassuring that our country’s future looks bright with forthcoming leaders like the shark jumper.

As an update to a previous entry about the state of the ospreys’ population in my area, I’d like to report all the pairs are present and accounted for. As of today’s final tally on the New Jersey side of the Delaware River, here’s the revised distribution map:

Click here for the full-size image.

Photos of the latest birds will be put up on the 2019 photo-journal for the raptors soon, which can be found by clicking here. The next part of the survey will be counting the young in about five to six weeks from now.

Thanks for stopping by and for your continued support.

About Mike Slickster

As an early retiree with an honorary doctorate degree from the proverbial "School of Hard Knocks," this upcoming author with a lot of free time on his hands utilizes his expansive repertoire for humorous yet tragic, wildly creative writing that contains years of imaginative fantasy, pure nonsense, classic slapstick, extreme happiness and searing heartbreak; gathered by a wealth of personal experiences throughout his thrilling—sometimes mundane or unusually horrid—free-spirited, rock-'n'-roller-coaster ride around our beloved Planet Earth. Mike Slickster's illustrious quest continues, living now in Act Three of his present incarnation, quite a bit on the cutting edge of profundity and philosophical merriment as seen through his colorful characters, most notably evident in the amusing Thirty Days Across the Big Pond series, all of which can be found at
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