Psychological Mumbo Jumbo

Sigmund Freud

Young Sigmund Freud


Id, Ego and Super Ego, three primary elements of one’s psyche fall into play, everyday: the inner workings of the Freudian mind. But sometimes, someone or thing knocks a pretentious character off their highfalutin pedestal now and then, karma to make a body feel real again.

When the stinging letdown or personal dilemma brings one down a notch or two, or three, pertinent idioms seem to ease the shock to their fragile ego or deeply emotional feelings, but used not to let on the particular event has tremendously effected the individual.

“Well that just took the wind out of my sails, by God,” is a nice way of putting it; or “Haters keep raining on my parade.”

“Popped my bubble” and “added insult to injury” can be a couple more.

Euphemisms, or unoffensive sayings about an otherwise dreadful occurrence, are a tremendous psychological tool to lessen a tragic “blow to the chin.” Calling your adversary “A few sandwiches short of a picnic” is a good way to lash back, diminishing his or her credibility, thus minimizing the amount of crow to be ingested.

Expanding this theoretical thought, outstanding clichés about having “bitten the dust” are found by extensively researching on Yahoo, noting the majority of the witty comments offered had to do with either death, bodily functions or excrement.

Of the three aforementioned topics, death—although not usually an enjoyable subject to bring up—was the most tolerable and humorous in its phrasing.

The other mundane expressions like a bottom blast, breaking wind and buttock bassoon; or building a dookie castle and barbarians at the gate are too rude for formal writing, whereby the second phrase in the preceding bunch is probably the most literately correct; however, these following metaphors about death tickled my imagination:

    Kicked the Bucket (most common one)

    Counting Worms

    Assumed Room Temperature

    Got Stamped Return to Sender

    Wandering the Elysian Fields

    Baste the Formaldehyde Turkey

    Crossed over the River Styx

    Danced His Last Dance

    Decided That Hell’s Got A Better HR Policy Than The Office

    Eating Dandelions By the Roots

    Fallen off the Perch

    Wrote His Final Chapter

    Gone to the Last Roundup

    Turned His Face to the Wall

    Immortally Challenged

    In the Bone Yard

    In the Horizontal Phone Booth (don’t see many of them anymore)

    Shuffle Off to Buffalo

    Six Feet Under (second most common one)

    Kicked the Oxygen Habit

    Put on the Wooden Overcoat

    Living in Procrastinator’s Paradise

    On a Permanent Vacation

    Bought the Farm

    Popped his clogs

    Flat-lined

    The Final Edit

    Extremely Passive Voice

    Fettuccine Al Dead-o

    Donating the Liver Pate

    Promoted to Subterranean Truffle Inspector

    In Zombie Land

    Termination Station

    Stairway to Heaven or Hell

    Reformatted by God

    Hotel California

I’m sure this list could go on ad infinitum. This is not meant to offend anyone. Add some if you know others. As far as making a toast to death, if that can be acceptable: may “the final curtain” be a stranger for quite a spell longer.

Thanks for your continued support.

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About Mike Slickster

As an early retiree with an honorary doctorate degree from the proverbial "School of Hard Knocks," this upcoming author with a lot of free time on his hands utilizes his expansive repertoire for humorous yet tragic, wildly creative writing that contains years of imaginative fantasy, pure nonsense, classic slapstick, extreme happiness and searing heartbreak; gathered by a wealth of personal experiences throughout his thrilling—sometimes mundane or unusually horrid—free-spirited, rock-'n'-roller-coaster ride around our beloved Planet Earth. Mike Slickster's illustrious quest continues, living now in Act Three of his present incarnation, quite a bit on the cutting edge of profundity and philosophical merriment as seen through his colorful characters, most notably evident in the amusing Thirty Days Across the Big Pond series, all of which can be found at Lulu.com.
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6 Responses to Psychological Mumbo Jumbo

  1. Shirley Ann says:

    How about the old Cockney Rhyming slang for it ” He’s brown bread!” ?

  2. Ah, I think I get it, as in changing color when becoming moldy, and bread rhymes with dead. How’s that?

  3. On second thought, brown bread is toast, like one’s final condition; and bread rhymes with dead 🙂

  4. Shirley Ann says:

    I think it’s time I introduced you to the magnificent punk poet Dr John Cooper Clarke – if you look for some of his poems on line they will give you a giggle. There is one entitled T**T which I’m sure we can all relate to some of those people we have come across in life who lets say are best forgotten . He also wrote another entitled ” I don’t want to be nice” . Let me know what you think about him. You can of course find him on You Tube – a funny character who looks like a cross between Alice Cooper and Max Wall .

  5. I looked him up on Wikipedia. He resembles Bob Dylan a bit in his profile pic. Listened to “Tw*t.” A very funny poem. I laughed out loud. I’ll have to listen to more. Here’s the one I looked at: https://youtu.be/g-aVtKEhpO0 Thanks.

  6. Shirley Ann says:

    He is a very dry witty character – had such a laugh when I went to see him at the local village hall close to my holiday place in Yorkshire.

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