The King of Slack and the Queen of Nag

Highly contrasted picture of the drum kit against sunlight from curtains

Electronic Drum Kit Silhouette

Apologies to my faithful visitors are in order for my slackness with posting any ranting here since earlier in the month. One diatribe per week graces these pages usually on a regular basis, but inspiration for such had been lacking lately.

My delving into digital, home recordings with recently acquired musical instruments and amplification have taken up a good portion of the time.

photo of all my instruments and amps

My Studio

The acoustic guitar in the background came from my cashing-in reward points from credit-card purchases and has been part of the family for several years
Fender Amp, Tambourine and Microphone

Fender Amp, Tambourine and Microphone

The black six-string on the right in the above, centered photo has been with me for years, as well. It’s a USB plug-in guitar, and no outside amplification is needed. The i-AXE also has the capability for running through a physical amp, which I finally convinced myself to buy one as an early Christmas gift last year (seen at right).

Drum Kit, Bass and Amp

Drum Kit, Bass and Amp

Digital-recording software came next, with a mixer and pre-amp for the computer, as seen on the table in the above, studio pic. The electronic drum set, bass and amp on the left were the most recent investments for my musical monstrosities and future entertainment.

What persuaded me to acquire the drums, after decades of not playing them, are the real-life sounds and tones of an acoustic kit are synthesized and heard only through headphones, keeping the noise to a minimum and tolerable level. The tapping of the drumsticks on the pads can barely be heard. Should I want to impress the neighborhood, the drums can be plugged into an amp. The instruments, save the acoustic, are all heard only through headphones also, so I thought.

My neighbor upstairs me asked if I got a treadmill or something, for she hears a regular thumping at times.

“It’s an electronic drum set. You must be hearing the bass pedal. I’m not disturbing you, am I?” I said.

“A drum set? Ha, ha, ha, no, not at all. You know me,” she said. “I just wanted to check you out and see how you were looking after all that working out.”

My waistline has gotten smaller, by the way. The green-coffee-bean diet’s results are still outstanding. She asked if I heard her carrying-on and walking about above me, for which I said, “Sometimes, for when you must be in a hurry; but don’t worry. It doesn’t bother me at all.” Actually, the woman is as quiet as a church mouse; please pardon the cliche.

I haven’t conferred with my downstairs neighbor yet. I’ve been waiting for him to complain, for then I would lay into him about his slamming the frigging front door all the time when he enters and leaves the flat. Not only does the portal slam once, but three times in short succession. He must be obsessive-compulsive and is checking to see if the door is latched. It rattles objects attached to the walls and is really quite annoying.

Flat Top Guitar with One Tuning Peg Broken Off

Flat Top Guitar with One Tuning Peg Broken Off

One last instrument of note is one that has been with me since 1994. The flat-top at the right came from a flea market. Notice one of the tuning pegs is missing, thanks to my son, who was a tyke at the time. He knocked it over and broke the knob off. I never got it fixed. The six-string became a five-string, tuned to an open “G,” used now and again on occasion.

I’ve been having a discussion recently with an old friend about being single, doing what one wants to do when and how one wants to do it. Not putting up with a nagging spouse is a main reason for me, having lived with the Queen of Nag for long enough.

By the looks of my studio, as portrayed in the previous photographs, which entails space in both the dining and living rooms of my flat, any woman would never put up with such an arrangement for long. This is a 24-hour man cave; like it or not, that’s tough guitar strings!

So until my next entry or musical presentation, I bid thee my best wishes for good health and happiness; and thanks for your continued support.

About Mike Slickster

As an early retiree with an honorary doctorate degree from the proverbial "School of Hard Knocks," this upcoming author with a lot of free time on his hands utilizes his expansive repertoire for humorous yet tragic, wildly creative writing that contains years of imaginative fantasy, pure nonsense, classic slapstick, extreme happiness and searing heartbreak; gathered by a wealth of personal experiences throughout his thrilling—sometimes mundane or unusually horrid—free-spirited, rock-'n'-roller-coaster ride around our beloved Planet Earth. Mike Slickster's illustrious quest continues, living now in Act Three of his present incarnation, quite a bit on the cutting edge of profundity and philosophical merriment as seen through his colorful characters, most notably evident in the amusing Thirty Days Across the Big Pond series, all of which can be found at
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