Today’s Tirade: Ten Things That Annoy the Hell Out of Me


1. The little stickers on fruits and vegetables from the supermarket; most of the time, upon attempting to remove them, the annoying labels are bonded to the outside of the foodstuff, making me take out a knife to scrape the adhesive tags off, along with a section of skin from said articles and sometimes a piece of my own flesh. Passing the sustenance under the running faucet to loosen the stickers most often doesn’t work either.

2. People who don’t use their turn signals while driving, especially those who turn into a parking lot or intersection from which I’m awaiting to exit, when I could have safely taken off ahead of them had they been using their indicators, but instead having to wait for the next dozen or so vehicles to pass until an opening is available.

3. Similar to my gripe in the previous entry, while I’m waiting to enter a busy roadway from a parking lot or intersection, the oncoming vehicle speeds up to prevent me from proceeding; but as soon as the driver is close enough to assume I’m not moving, he slows down considerably and takes his sweet time passing while looking in my direction, which in turn allows the vehicles behind him to catch up, thus preventing my exit until the dozen or more cars go by before I’m able to merge onto the thoroughfare.

4. Twitter: too many reasons to mention; however, one of the biggest turn-offs is not receiving an acknowledgement to one of my tweets sent to a follower. Why bother following me if you are not going to reply?

5. Forgetting to press the “Record” button on my camcorder while thinking I’m capturing a once-in-a-lifetime scene. That is my own damned fault and I seldom do it anymore. In the same vein, forgetting to recharge the extra batteries for both my video cams and still camera.

6. My computer’s crashing in the middle of a project, when not having occasionally saved what I’ve done up until then, which I normally, periodically do from having learned from prior, bad experiences.

7. People talking on cell phones unnecessarily; I won’t go into detail, having dedicated an entire tirade on the subject: see: http://slicker.livejournal.com/2404.html.

8. Cashiers who don’t say hello, look you in the eye, or say thank you after finalizing your purchase.

9. Not examining the expiration date on a gallon of milk just purchased, and finding out at home when placing it into the refrigerator, today was the final day marked for purchase. Again, that’s my own bloody fault, but why is it when every other time, I looked at the end date; and at least a week was left to it?

10. Having my Internet service go down when I’ve just about finished downloading a large file or program, or when I’m in the process of uploading something critical to one of my Websites.

The preceding was just the tip of the iceberg, and I could go on and on; but that’s enough for this diatribe. I’ll save some fodder for my next harangue.

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About Mike Slickster

As an early retiree with an honorary doctorate degree from the proverbial "School of Hard Knocks," this upcoming author with a lot of free time on his hands utilizes his expansive repertoire for humorous yet tragic, wildly creative writing that contains years of imaginative fantasy, pure nonsense, classic slapstick, extreme happiness and searing heartbreak; gathered by a wealth of personal experiences throughout his thrilling—sometimes mundane or unusually horrid—free-spirited, rock-'n'-roller-coaster ride around our beloved Planet Earth. Mike Slickster's illustrious quest continues, living now in Act Three of his present incarnation, quite a bit on the cutting edge of profundity and philosophical merriment as seen through his colorful characters, most notably evident in the amusing Thirty Days Across the Big Pond series, all of which can be found at Lulu.com.
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2 Responses to Today’s Tirade: Ten Things That Annoy the Hell Out of Me

  1. Anonymous says:

    Allow me to add to your assortment… #11: Top ten lists.

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