Today’s Tirade

One of my pet peeves is dealing with people who insist on unnecessarily using their infernal cell phones while standing in line at retail outlets, talking about nothing of importance or relevance for blabbing in the first place.

Even worse yet, if the blowhards were gabbing when they entered the store, speaking so loudly I could hear them rambling on about nothing of urgency throughout the entire marketplace, while they spoke several decibels higher than one would in a normal conversation; and with the windbags then settling in line next to me, still jabbering away about how nothing much was up; but they were just buying bread and milk and considered purchasing Tootsie Rolls, I was brought to the brink of telling them, “Shut the fuck up already,” and qualifying it with, “Next time, finish your frigging conversation outside, or in the damned car before walking in.”

Of course, I never had the balls to do it; but one of these days, it’s going to slip out. Chantal told me I needed to calm down and stop taking things so seriously. She said my face had turned red, and I could feel my blood pressure had risen a few notches.

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About Mike Slickster

As an early retiree with an honorary doctorate degree from the proverbial "School of Hard Knocks," this upcoming author with a lot of free time on his hands utilizes his expansive repertoire for humorous yet tragic, wildly creative writing that contains years of imaginative fantasy, pure nonsense, classic slapstick, extreme happiness and searing heartbreak; gathered by a wealth of personal experiences throughout his thrilling—sometimes mundane or unusually horrid—free-spirited, rock-'n'-roller-coaster ride around our beloved Planet Earth. Mike Slickster's illustrious quest continues, living now in Act Three of his present incarnation, quite a bit on the cutting edge of profundity and philosophical merriment as seen through his colorful characters, most notably evident in the amusing Thirty Days Across the Big Pond series, all of which can be found at Lulu.com.
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